If you ask me single best thing to do in life, its nurturing relationships. No matter how strong you have laid the foundation, without nurturing your relationships will eventually fall apart. What happens when you don’t water your plants, same thing happens when you fail to nurture your relationship. Thriving in a good relationship might be difficult, but when you put your heart and soul to make it work, then there is nothing like it.
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21 tips about nurturing relationships
Take the first step
When you feel something is not right, immediately take action. Take time and think about what went wrong. Don’t wait for your partner to act upon it. Be the first one to find out the problem and the solution.
Understanding each other
When your partner hesitates to talk to you, be patient and give time, try to understand what’s going on. Trying to understand another person might be challenging especially when you are in the first phase of a relationship, but over the period understanding each other will be natural. Time and patience are all it takes.
To have someone understand your mind is a different intimacy. Try out the following for a better understanding
Start from scratch, they say true love is falling in love many times with the same person. Remember the good old days, the time that you spent longing for each other, the time that you waited for hours just to get a glance of his/her sight, your bike rides, walking together hand in hand, remember all the cute romantic movements.
Get to know each other in a better way
Talk about his/her past and present, especially the bad ones. Become a therapist and heal their souls with your love and care. Be gentle; make sure that you do not forcefully pull out words from them. Let them open their hearts to you.
Listening to your partner helps in nurturing relationships
Research says when you listen to your partner and pay attention; there is a better understanding. This cannot be neglected; listening to everything can sometimes be boring. However, remember you are the one your partner wants to rely on. So giving some attention to their rattle will definitely strengthen your relationship.
Appreciate – Please do!
In spite of a busy day, he has not forgotten to buy your favourite cupcakes from your usual place -please appreciate
Quite a hectic day and she has taken the effort to call your parents and check on them –please appreciate
He took permission from his office to drop you at your friends place – please appreciate
Her top recipes are all your favourite ones – please appreciate
Lots of appreciation leads to a lot of happiness. Do appreciate all the small things your partner does.
Your bonding is better when you are playful with your partner. Research says, playful couples are the happiest couples. Your work and other things could keep you busy and stressful all the time, but ensure that you spend enough time with your spouse. Play, dance, sing and mock at each other.
Respect your spouse
Respect his/her choices, opinion, desire, and decision etc. This does not mean that you abide and follow everything your partner wants. You do your thing and let him/her do what they want. Always be careful on how you communicate, though you are used to calling names and mocking each other, at times this can become an issue, especially when you have a guest at home.
Being there for each other always is a ground rule in any relationship. “Do not give up on your spouse” This is very important. When problems begin, sometimes you don’t know how to tackle them and you tend to give up on each other. This is the crucial time when you have to hold each other’s hands and extend support.
Romance is the essence of nurturing relationships
Whether it is the beginning stage of your relationship or if you are a couple married over for a decade, romance plays a major role in nurturing your marriage. Over the time either one of you will feel that you have outgrown the romance. Don’t let that happen.
Be touchy, hold hands and walk together, cuddle on the couch and watch a movie; embrace each other. Scientists say that, physical touch releases oxytocin (bonding hormone) this however helps you to bond with your partner.
Plan a surprise
Celebrate every special movement, even if there are none.
Here are few tips to make his/her day
- Write notes and send it along with his/her lunch
- Buy flowers/cards to show appreciation
- Take him/her to a favorite restaurant from time to time.
- Exchange gifts
Remember this, a thoughtful gift out stands an expensive one.
Keep working on your relationship to ensure a smooth flow, this is one way you can nurture your relationship. You cannot clap with one hand, cooperate with your partner and resolve your conflicts.
Live in the present
Bringing your past mistakes will not do well in any relationship. Learn to forget and move on. What you experience today matters. Practice forgiveness and let go of the resolved conflicts.
More “us” time
Giving your precious time to your spouse is the best thing you can do to maintain a happy relationship. This will make them feel more important and special. When your partner wants to spend time alone or with his friends, let them be. Don’t be too demanding, explain the necessity of spending more time together.
Don’t hide your feelings
Also don’t wait too long, actively express your genuine emotions without any inhibitions.
- Start with a lot of positivity, give compliments
- Kiss and cuddle your spouse
- Tell you longed to see him/her the whole day.
- Show how much you value his/her presence
- Show interest in his/her profession
Get your partner to open up
If your partner is a timid person then the burden lies on your shoulders to get them to open up, at least in the early stages of your relationship
Ask questions directly
- How do I look?
- Did you like what I cooked?
- Did you miss me?
- Can I kiss you?
With these sorts of encouraging questions, you will see a remarkable change in your partner.
Don’t dump your frustrations on to your partner
As humans its quiet natural to get frustrated in our daily life, when you bring that home and take it on your partner then that’s not fair. Communicate with your spouse about what is frustrating you.
Don’t bring your work to home
Creating a balanced work and family space is an art. Prioritize and work according to the schedule. Stop when you have to stop.
Here are few tips to maintain work-life balance
- Family-friendly work arrangements like work from or working at flexible hours
- Maintaining a schedule and following the same
- Switching from work mode to family time
Sharing household jobs
This is the most debated topic over the years, managing household is still gender biased. Women are expected to work and take household responsibilities whereas men are suggested to help women in bits and pieces. Thus women end up doing multitasking and also results in unhappy relationship.
What you should do?
- Split chores
- Agree to your timetables
- Let your partner do things their way
- Switch chores if boring
- Hire help
Be transparent with your partner
The openness and honesty builds trust within a relationship and promotes a sense of peace and serenity. In other cases, just to survive the relationship people tend to hide their emotions, but you should understand that prolonged dishonesty leads to damaging relations.
Let it be his/her way
Compromise on little things, for your partner’s sake, after all isn’t he your better half? If that brings a smile on their face, what more do you what?
Being in love is a beautiful feeling, nurture your relationship from today and experience that beautiful feeling each day!
Recommended books for nurturing relationships
This article is contributed by Ms Sudha Suganthi. A travelling storyteller, turned to a writer. She enjoys doing both. Sudha’s therapy: travelling and meeting more people gives you more knowledge with fun.
More Article from Ms Sudha Suganthi: Importance of team work
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